Friday, May 9, 2014

another world

Today was a typical squirrely Friday.  The workday can’t be over soon enough on Fridays, but today was just worse than usual.  With so many projects waiting my attention, I couldn’t seem to focus on any one task.  That limbo state is a dreadful place to be.  I paced my cubicle, walked the halls, ran the stairs, stared out the window, and played games on my phone.  Finally, an hour before what should have quitting time, I started returning phone calls, answering emails, and completing project tasks.  I worked a couple of hours over just because I fell into that mindless place and lost track of time.

The mindless zone is sort of a curse, but also a blessing for somebody like me who is completely burnt out with her job.  Time passes quickly when one is engaged in work without being present in the reality of it.  I still recall vividly a time when I spaced out at a traffic light.  I was waiting to pull out onto a busy highway.  One car was in front of me and at least one behind; the light was red for a very long time.  The car behind me blasted his horn to alert me that the light was not getting any greener.  The car in front of me had just cleared the intersection as I took my foot off the brake.  And then from the left side, a giant Pepsi truck came swerving from behind stopped cars and ran the red light.  He was trying to brake - his tires were smoking and he laid two stripes of black rubber before and across the entire intersection.  If I had been paying attention that day and followed the car in front as an attentive driver should have, I would have been broadsided by that big truck, no doubt about it.  Most likely, that would have been the end of KYLady.

This truck DID catch my attention a few days ago.  Take a close look.

The curse aspect of the zone is that it’s very easy for people to sneak up on you, or to catch you unaware.  The worst is in meetings.  I’m very bad to be off in a better place when someone directs a question to me.  Then what?  I have to hedge and ask to have the question repeated.  It’s quite embarrassing at times, especially if I happen to be staring right at the person when it all happens.  Maybe it’s good that I’m old.  Maybe some people just think I’m half-deaf rather than slow-brained...hopefully they do.  

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