dress soliloquy

I’ve started shopping.  If you know me very well at all, you know that shopping is something I do by necessity, not because it’s something enjoyable.  Some people (Someone comes to mind) LOVE to shop.  Someone volunteers to shop for me all the time.  I’m grateful.  Since we’ve been married, we’ve never even once run out of paper towels, toilet paper, ketchup, laundry soap, or any other of life’s necessities.  That aspect of being married has been a definite positive for me. 

What am I shopping for?  *sigh*   *** really big sigh *** 

I need a dress.  Not just any dress.  Buying a dress is tough enough, but buying a mother-of-the-bride dress is daunting.  Just Google mother of bride dress and take a look for yourself at the stuff that pops up.  Lord, I just want an ordinary dress that is not too dowdy and not too flashy and not too ridiculously ornate...she’s getting married...we’re not joining a circus, and I sure as hell am not the one getting married.  Perhaps if I weighed 60 pounds less, I could see myself in one of those sleek little sheath numbers, or something flowy and romantic, but those styles are not happening on this body.  No way.  Perhaps I just need a Harry Potter invisibility cloak.  A decision has to be made within the next few weeks.  Really, I should probably just take myself to a dreaded mall and try some shit on. 

Women’s clothes are always modeled on young, pretty women who are what...size 2 or 4 perhaps – tall and leggy to boot.  So yeah – any dresses look fabulous on them.  But then you get somebody like me, and take that same dress in my size (what...something between 10 and 16...because women’s clothes are like that), well it might as well be an 8X for what it looks like on me.  This may be one of those cases where we need to go to a mall that has a bar...and have a few drinks before trying to shop...I need a designated driver, for sure. 

Part of the issue too, is that I am a tightwad.  The worst kind, so my brother tells me.  For both of my weddings, I bought a dress that I was sure I’d wear again for another occasion.  Never.  A dress worn in a wedding, no matter what it is or looks like, is always a wedding dress...or so it seems to me.  So, when I splurge on a dress for Sarah’s wedding, will I wear it again?  Surely Erin and Emily will get married someday.  Probably the dress will never be worn again; let’s be real.              

feathered friends

And just like that, Christmas is over, 2018 has arrived, and University #1 starts Spring Semester tomorrow.  My classes are built and open for business, with new “standardized” format and all.  They implemented a new version of Blackboard over the holiday.  It’s cleaner with a more modern look, really better for mobile devices no doubt.  I like it.  Standardization is good, but the changes for my students result in some extra mouse clicks to get around.  They will adapt.  I will meet one of my classes tomorrow morning...assuming we meet.  We have an ice storm moving in overnight which may cause morning classes to be cancelled.   

Last Christmas (2017), Sarah gave me a birdfeeder that sticks right to a window.  There it sat in the box on my shelf for nearly an entire year, but late last month, I took the screen out of the window beside my desk, cleaned the window, and attached the bird feeder.  It’s wonderful!!!  What a silly woman I was to wait so long to try it out!  The big birds, woodpeckers, and squirrels hog the big birdfeeder out by the tree.  My deskside birdfeeder attracts chickadees and my new favorite birds – titmice.  I love to watch the birds and squirrels while I work.

Tufted titmouse

   

Of course, Molly adores the bird feeder.  Her new favorite place is the window sill, but the birds do not come around when she is standing guard.  She has figured that out, so she oftentimes sits below the window and waits for the sound of a little bird landing on the birdfeeder.  Then she pounces at the window from below.  Every few days, I have to clean the Molly snot off the window.  Gross. 

Molly is standing guard

Big news.  Sarah is getting married.  Soon, actually (in just a few months).  I’m excited for her and her fiancée, and for our family to be expanding.  She is stressing over getting things planned and arrangements taken care of, but I’m sure it will all be lovely.  She and I have very different views of weddings, but it’s OK.  Perhaps it’s partly a generational thing, or just a difference in our personalities and tastes.  If I had to get married again...nope, I can’t even go there.  I love Someone dearly, but if something happens to him or he jumps ship for somebody else, old KYLady will NEVER remarry.  Of course, I said that after the first time, and here I am.  Never say never, but this time I mean it with all certainty. 

Erin and Emily have applied to several graduate schools and are finishing the last semester at their respective universities in May.  Sadly, they are scheduled to graduate on the same day.  I’m already disappointed that I can’t attend both.  Someone will go to one and I will go to the other, probably Erin’s.  Someone stresses out to drive in Louisville traffic.  Hell, I hate driving in Louisville traffic, but it’s not nearly as scary as driving in Houston.  I hope both get accepted to their #1 picks.  We should find out before spring.  It’s possible that they could end up at the same university for graduate school.  We will see.

For now, I welcome 2018 and look forward to all that is coming (that I know about, at least).